Yesterday we got nearly 7 inches of rain with terrific winds swirling around the house. This morning there are little branches from the neighbors trees in our yard and the new Chinese pistache out front was bent way over. The underground stream running through the backyard will be flowing for the rest of the season!
As the winds roared I thought about leaks. Two winters ago a small dampness appeared in the NE corner ceiling. When I tried to assess the damage I saw a vent in the shallow eave very near the wet spot and imagined the rain swirling into the opening, soaking the insulation and gradually dripping down through the drywall. I enjoy standing in the laundry porch watching the gusts of rain switching directions, but worried about it getting in the vent. Then last winter it bloomed into an ugly patch of mildew over 2′ across. It had been my youngest’s room, now used as a guest room. I tried not to look at it all winter, but the image of the rain swirling up into the vent every time it rained nagged me.
So mid morning had I started worrying out loud about that vent that we still hadn’t done anything to block it. And my dear DH looked at me through bleary flu clouded eyes and said, “Remember it was the flashing around the electrical pole where it comes through the roof. We put roof tar on it last spring.”
DUH. That’s right. Last spring when we checked out the situation we discovered that my concern for the vent was mistaken. We just pulled out the roof tar and fixed the leak so fast it was completely forgotten. But the memories of the worry lived on and were front and center when it started to rain again.
Memories playing tricks on me. If I am so easily deluded, I think others may be too.
ETA: I posted my remembrance of “the painting” debacle a couple months ago.
singout 
Wow, it sounds like we went thru the same storm yesterday. Are you up in Northern California by any chance? I thought the wind was going to rip the roof off my house at one point. And I’m totally amazed we didn’t lose our power…
Same storm but the central coast, which is kind of windy generally. Yesterday was awesome. We lost our power midafternoon until after 11:00pm.
I get your metaphor, I have read the other “delusion” and I am sorry. It never seems to get any easier for you.
Denise
My experiences, memories, and feelings are delusions…
And you can vouch for the veracity of this Denise because your abilities of divination are so astute, so incredible in fact that they defy belief…
That is amazing.
This is what I call an attack more than an expression of hurt feelings.
I suspect the issue is more about the strong emotions that Joy experienced, rather than the painting itself. Regardless of the details of how this whole event transpired, it clearly had a powerful impact on her and continues to do so. Perhaps more focus on the emotions and feelings rather than the specific circumstances would help (?)
Thank you for saying that Maybe. That is so true, if I have the details right or not about the delivery—that is how I remember it– it may not be how my mother remembers it. That is really neither here nor there.
The fact of the matter is it had a powerful impact on me, a destructive one, and that hasn’t been resolved and is very real to me. Dismissing me out of hand as delusional, well and people wonder why I get angry at my mother.
Being dismissed hurts.
You are not being dismissed. I’m sorry if that’s what it sounds like to you. I am, as usual, paying a great deal of attention to you.
I agree more emphasis on feelings and emotions could be of great value. Less emphasis on justifying them would make it easier for us.